Carson sitting up unassisted! |
I should have rejoiced in that moment... allowed my heart to soar in hearing our therapist say those words; having hope that Carson is on a journey to speaking.
But instead, I was hesitant. Are the things she is seeing just a 'fluke'? Will he continue to grow in his speech? Is this really the beginning stages of him speaking?
I think today I was saddened by my own response. I realize that there have been so many ups followed by downs, expectations and hopes dashed, progression then backsliding... that I wasn't able to savor that moment; and that saddened my heart.
As I was thinking about my reaction, the Lord brought my friend Tiffany to mind. Recently, she experienced the most amazing thing - she saw the very strong heartbeat of her very healthy 12-week baby, growing in her womb. After the tragic loss of many babies before this one, this first trimester has been very hard for her.... she has gone through many 'hesitations', many times that she hasn't been able to 'savor the moment', all because past experience has shown her that this dream that she is holding in her hands, could pass away. But now, after seeing and hearing this baby's heartbeat, she can now rejoice in the fact that she is going to be holding her baby in about 6 months! GOD IS GOOD!
Swinging in a toddler swing for the first time! |
Are you holding back from savoring this moment in life, because your past experience leads you to fear?
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